75 Pennies.

There’s a sign on Grandma Judy’s lanai that says, “The most important things in life aren’t things.” It resonated with me when all I was really trying to do was chase tiny lizards out of her screened in porch.

But don’t get me wrong – I still think it’s OK to collect things. I’m a bit of a collector. I’ve got plenty of old baseball cards and a slew of fishing lures. Lately I’ve had a growing collection of license plates too. I’ve never collected anything weird like spoons or stamps though. I have a coffee can full of wheat pennies that I’m sure holds some value beyond one cent per. But to be frank, I aint a coin collector either.

There’s an old favorite, family story of young Sista Emma sighing sadly on one particularly difficult afternoon in 2009. Our 5-year-old princess had “Lost a lot of really important people in her life.” Uncle Ray, Grandma Fox “and now Michael Jackson”. That story always makes me laugh and reminds me of the innocence and caring heart of my only daughter.

Truth be told, - I’ve lost a lot of really important people in my life recently.

To use another coin analogy, I was once asked if I’d rather have 75 pennies in my pocket or 3 quarters. Without hesitation I answered, “3 quarters.” The same holds true for friendships. I learned this lesson at a trying point in my life. My wife pointed out that I made an effort to be friends with everyone instead of focusing on genuine relationships with the ones whose opinions matter the most. Turns out Michele was right again. We’re better off carrying a few “Quarters” as friends than trying to manage keeping all the pennies happy.

A friend that is a Quarter to me is one that you can go to in all situations; a friend that knows all versions of you and still choses to be your friend. Those kinds of friends that you can talk with about life, and God and family and work and hopes and the future and yet you expect them to be honest in every way. I’ve had a few of those boundless friendships. In September 2021 Mick Skalsky passed of pancreatic cancer. He was my mentor and true friend. Two months later, in November, Dave Hicks took his own life. Dave was a friend of mine since 4^th grade and one of my best buds. And in September of this year, Todd Heimdal passed of glioblastoma – a fast growing, aggressive brain cancer. Todd was more than a neighbor and a fishing buddy, he was one of my go-too guys for everything. Yesterday we laid him to rest.

In the span of 3 years, God has called home and collected 3 of my closest friends.  John and Brent, I need you fellas to stick around awhile. I’m down to my last few Quarters.