Sweet Virginia

 Proverbs 27:17 - "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another."

My Mom, along with my sister and me, found ourselves on some tough times in the early 1980's. Tarina and I spent my 2nd grade school year in Warroad with Dad while Mom received treatment for her mental health struggles. On the mend, Mom was trying to hold our family together while chasing men in and out of jail.  Those men came and went while my mother toiled away trying to raise two kids on a single income, without a car; on the rough side of the railroad tracks in East Aurora. For 3rd grade we were back in Illinois, and I was enrolled at Bardwell Elementary.

We lived just off of Broadway Street/Highway 25 in a 2 bedroom, second-story apartment. I remember a great sledding hill in the back yard and that the building was yellow. It wasn't far from the Clark gas station and lucky for us, it was within walking distance of the house of a certified Angel. Virginia Collman was a daycare provider that lived maybe 3 or 4 houses down Concord Street from the elementary school that my sister and I would attend - my third in as many years. Sweet Virginia provided stability, love and genuine care for me and my family when we needed it most.

They say God puts people in our lives for a reason. He does it at His chosen time. There was no better time for Mom. There was no better time for Tarina and me. Virginia had a big family and an even bigger daycare family. That little house on the east side of the Fox River was filled with busy bodies and love. It was there that I fell in love with the Chicago Bears, He-Man cartoons and Virginia's macaroni and cheese. 

Because I was 8 years old at the time, I was not privy to the financial agreements between my mother and our daycare provider. I only vaguely remember some of the house rules - like No Daycare Kids Upstairs - that's reserved for family and Stay out of Don's Chair when Don is home from work! But now that I'm older and have had our own wonderful experience with a loving Daycare Mom, I see that Virginia loved us unconditionally. She bent her own rules for Jeanine and the kids. As I remember it, we were often the first kids there in the morning and the last to be picked up at night. With my mom riding public transportation to low paying jobs, life was hard. It was harder because of who she was running with socially. The police visited our little yellow apartment more than once. 

We walked to the grocery store and the laundry mat together. We walked up the hill to Virginia's house in the morning before school and walked home together at night when Mom was home from work. While at Virginia's she didn't pass judgement. She set rules and expectations for us and consequences when we slipped. She quickly made my sister and I feel like family and now that she's passed, I'm learning that was her gift to the World.

Virginia Collman was so caring and honest and genuine that most of the people she came across felt as if she loved them the most. 

Midway through the next school year, in the middle of grade 4, we up and moved out of the Hood and 10 miles down the river to the more affluent Village of Oswego. In a year and a half Virginia and her family had committed to my Mother, my sister and I for life. They visited Oswego often and as things stabilized for our Mother, we reciprocated and visited them in the old neighborhood. We grew up with her daughters as friends and as we became adults were able to celebrate weddings and growing families together. But it was Virginia that was always at the center of it all. Her smile and tenderness made me want to do things with my life that met her approval and made her happy. We wrote letters periodically when I was in the Marines. She always kept in touch with my Mom. Virginia even came to Minnesota for my wedding. I'll need to find that picture of her and my grandmother together at the reception. It'll bring me a smile.

Virginia's old fashioned ways of always sending a Birthday Card reminded me of her God given ability to build genuine relationships with people and remain so positive about the gift of life. Her passing this weekend will leave a void in our Earthly home but 87 years is a life well lived and I am so thankful that God put her in my life when he did and kept her there. She's home with him now. I love you Virginia.

Sweet Virginia.